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Smith  (59 articles)

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Yee-Ha!
Tired of paying top dollar to attend professional sporting events? Next time try rodeo. [01-04-99]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Pilgrim's Progress
Away in a camper, no shocks for their bed, the little, poor Canadians lay down their sweet heads... [12-27-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Suicidal Tendencies
Anything Dr. Jack Kevorkian can do to get the American public to recognize the need and humane purpose in assisting the terminally ill in ending their lives of suffering is justified. [12-07-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Merchant Princes
Case One begins with a transmission gone wrong, and the good news just keeps building from there. [11-23-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Hate Bait
More legislation won't stop stupid people from committing wretched acts. [10-26-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

In The Zone
Here it is October again, and damned if our resident redneck hasn't begun looking forward to the World Serious. [10-12-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Jellystone Ranger
How they managed to get so many and varied a menu of geological grandeur and Divine experiments gone awry, and locate them all in one national park, passeth human understanding. [09-21-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Will Work For Food
Isn't there some rich yuppie out there who'll sponsor this poor but upright family of immigrants? [09-08-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Shooting Star
In Raton, N. M., they really know how to stink up the place in old-fashioned style. [08-24-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Tongue Twister
We need a new word for congress of the oldest kind. [08-17-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Speculative Spectating
Continuing our committed coverage of the least-watched sport in the nation. [06-22-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Barry's Legend
Don't expect the boffo box-office the death of Arizona's favorite straight-tongued son-of-a-Jewish drygoods dealer did last week to spark some renaissance in political plain-speaking. [06-15-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Endangered Feces
Can't we all just get along? [06-01-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Armageddon Tired of All This Crap
India is testing its nukes -- good, maybe we won't have to die by inches much longer. [05-26-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Polyglot Perfection
Official English was a bad idea promulgated by narrow-minded people ignorant of America's heritage. [05-11-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Condom Nation
Having a rubber in your wallet -- even a taxpayer-subsidized rubber -- doesn't mean you're going to get laid. [04-27-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Stand By Your Ma'am
Somewhere up there, Tammy is eating GooGoos and drinking Southern Comfort with Hank and Elvis and Patsy and Dottie, and laughing her ass off. [04-20-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Murder By HMO
When the going gets tough, why does your HMO always seem to give you the run-around? [04-13-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Grope Springs Eternal
These days, Americans almost seem to admire a president who has a way with ze girls. Almost. [03-30-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

Thar' She Blows!
Speculations in the gutter of American politics. [02-02-98]
— Jeff Smith, TUCSON WEEKLY

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