Volume I, Issue 26
December 1 - December 8, 1997

Everybody has a theory about the meaning of Christmas (see related story in this week's News section). Here's mine: Christmas is about learning to live through disappointment. You probably think I'm being cynical and negative like some sort of uptight Virgo, but you're wrong. Overcoming frustrated expectations is the key to survival and success. Why else does Frosty melt, if not to teach kids that all things must die? Why else does the board game Mystery Date exist, if not to introduce girls to the disappointing randomness of love?

Christmas is like that. We teach our children that their moral behavior over the course of the year determines Santa's generosity. We encourage them to write wish lists for Santa and mail them to a postal address that doesn't exist. And then on Christmas morning, when they're desperately pining for remote-controlled helicopters and $200 stuffed animals, what do we give them? Underwear. At least, I give my kids underwear. They cry, sure, but they're learning a valuable lesson that I know they'll appreciate later on. Plus, they get to own a wide assortment of underwear.

So teach your kids a lesson this Christmas: when they ask for snowshoes, give them old tennis rackets and some twine. When they ask for a trip to Bermuda, take them to Delhi. When they ask for lobster, give them shrimp. When they ask for the latest hot CD-ROM computer game, give them an old Atari 2600 game system (complete with a cartridge for video miniature golf). Dysfunctional? Hardly. It's the reason for the season!

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Art and Obsession
George Dunbar at NOMA through December, and Franklin Adams at Earth & Fire through November. [11]
D. Eric Bookhardt

Mixed-Media Memories
Emmi Whitehorse was reared in the traditional Navajo fashion until she went off to school, where she eventually learned about Western European art traditions. [12]
Margaret Regan