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Monster love
Our obsession with the great American undead
By Ted Drozdowski
OCTOBER 27, 1997:
Monsters are beautiful. Yes, they're into bloodsucking, flesh-rending, and
devil-worshiping. But they're beautiful.
That's how I've felt about them ever since the night my father let me stay up
late to watch a rickety coach carry the hapless Renfield up rattling Carpathian
mountain roads to Castle Dracula. Renfield's introduction to the Count, and
mine, was spectacular. Bela Lugosi was so smooth. Impeccably attired
like some romantic character from Byron's inner circle, possessed of an
elemental connection with nature. ("Listen to them. The children of the night.
What music they make," he observes with laconic dignity as wolf howls echo.) He
also brimmed with the power to command any situation (unless crossed by a cross
or silver bullet, but even Superman had kryptonite hang-ups), to place any
person -- especially the ladies -- under his spell. So suave -- and scary.
Anybody who lodged in a coffin yet arose to walk among the living and still got
dates was one badass dude.
Dracula. Frankenstein. The Mummy. The Wolf Man. They were among the biggest
heroes of my childhood. Like me, they were misunderstood -- a current of pathos
always ran through their stormy constitutions. Unlike me, they took no grief
from anyone but the most hard-assed or lucky character. No bully ever punched
out the Wolf Man in a schoolyard. The monstrous Fab Four of film and their
successors also became a bond between me and my hard-to-know father, who
relished staying up on weekends to chortle with me over the moody details of
everything from House of Dracula to Godzilla to Terror is a
Man (a cheap Dr. Moreau rip-off).
Finally, these beings -- especially Dracula, the Wolf Man, Frankenstein, and
the original Mummy -- possessed one power in particular that held me in thrall:
the ability to transcend death. Maybe I was just a morbid little kid, but I
think the combination of seeing my first dog killed by a train and John Kennedy
and Lee Harvey Oswald gunned down on national television all within a year got
me thinking about mortality well before I would have liked. And these guys
(Drac, Frank, Wolf, and Mum) had Death -- the worst and most utterly real
villain of all -- flat-out beat. (Hell, if JFK had become a vampire, maybe
Marilyn Monroe would still be stalking the earth, too.)
So I became their lifelong fan. To this day I love my monsters. Not the cheap
psychopaths in supernatural wolf's clothing, like Freddie Krueger, Jason
Voorhees, or Michael Myers. I mean real monsters -- those who exuded terror
with style, instead of in drops of stage blood.
As a child I watched all the horror films that Universal Studios turned out in
the '30s and '40s, genre-defining efforts that stand as the finest, most
atmospheric works of their kind. I read magazines like Famous Monsters of
Filmland and biographies of Lugosi, Karloff, and the Chaneys. I bought,
assembled, and meticulously painted all the models that Aurora minted:
Frankenstein treading over a grave, Dracula in a menacing pose, the Creature
from the Black Lagoon chained to the bottom of a pool in Marineland. When they
reissued them all with glow-in-the-dark parts, I built them again. Movie
posters decorated my walls. It's an addiction I've never grown out of. When
MCA/Universal Home Video began reissuing all the classic horror titles on video
a few years ago, I started snapping them up. I try to watch each movie at least
once a year, reveling in the stiff-necked romantic subplots and the deliciously
stage-ripe dialogue. Around every Halloween I host a monster-movie marathon.
And last year, when my wife Laurie gave me a pair of 18-inch-tall
Frankenstein's Monster and Gill-Man figures (licensed from Universal by
Hamilton Gifts), I placed them on the molding above our front doorway. They're
fierce and, let's face it, pretty damn funny sentinels.
When the US Postal Service started selling stamps bearing the faces of
Dracula, Karloff's Frankenstein and Mummy, and the Wolf Man this month, these
hellish fiends were anointed by our federal government. To me, it was an
acknowledgment of their place in America's cultural legacy. After all, they'd
been part of our vernacular for decades. The greedy and exploitative are often
tagged as vampires or bloodsuckers, and Halloween-costumed Counts all borrow
Lugosi's Hungarian accent. The bandaged are often described as looking like the
Mummy (not a mummy, a very important distinction); the big and gangly are
sometimes not very kindly compared to Frankenstein (remember the line in Sam
Cooke's hit "Another Saturday Night"?). And lately the Wolf Man's been showing
up in shaving-product ads in high-profile publications like Rolling
Stone. (A musical footnote: Peter Green, the founding guitarist of
Fleetwood Mac, was dubbed "the Werewolf" by the residents of his small English
village when he flipped out in the '80s and refused to cut his hair or
fingernails for years.)
There's also something pretty ironic about the post office selling the images
of our great American monsters. Dracula, the Mummy, Frankenstein, and the Wolf
Man are undead and unholy, as their legends go. Vampires have Satanic
allegiances; they abhor crosses, mock God . . . all the trimmings.
Frankenstein is a soulless hulk, stitched together from the dead and unable to
tell right from wrong. (In Todd Browning's original film, he accidentally
drowns a child who befriends him, hoping that she can float like a flower
petal.) The Mummy -- he crossed the gods of ancient Egypt by attempting to
raise the dead, desecrating their temples. And the Wolf Man is the animal side
of humanity unleashed, uncaring about the consequences of his actions,
literally under a curse.
What's next, stamps with Karl Marx and Leon Trotsky? Let's face it, we've
lived in an increasingly conservative country for nearly 20 years now. And the
religious right has not only the ear of the media but the coattails of Congress
and the White House to tug upon. Yet I haven't heard a peep of protest about
the post office providing us an opportunity to give the undead a good licking.
There was more noise from Jesse Helms and other Christian rightists when poor
ol' Elvis Presley got the First Class treatment -- seein' as how he was a drug
addic'.
Maybe that's another power that the great monsters have: they can transcend
even our most deep-seated hang-ups. And that's another reason to love them --
warts, fangs, and all.
Ted Drozdowski is a freelance writer living in Boston.
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