Mr. Smarty Pants
By R.U. Steinberg
JULY 27, 1998:
Cardinals invariably travel in pairs.
Stan Mason invented the granola bar, disposable diapers, squeezable catsup
bottles, and the first microwaveable dishes, named after him, Masonware. His company's
name is Simco.
The average American eats 11.7 pounds of chocolate every year.
Before killing his victims, Jeffrey Dahmer liked to watch videos with them.
He particularly liked the part in Return of the Jedi when the evil Emperor
would make Luke writhe in pain.
Aaron Burr, had he won the presidency, intended to invade Canada and annex it
to the U.S.
The above is information which Mr. Smarty Pants read in a book, a magazine, or
the newspaper;heard on the radio; saw on television; or overheard at a party. Got any facts? Email Mr. Smarty Pants at email@example.com.