Weekly Wire
Metro Pulse Psychic Movie Predictions

APRIL 19, 1999: 

Ah, to be young, pretty, vapid, and greedy—and living in L.A., home of the young, pretty, vapid, and greedy. Patricia Arquette, Dermot Mulroney, Ellen DeGeneres (in a strange brown wig, no less), Mary-Louise Parker, and Don Johnson star and Roland Joffé (The Killing Fields, The Mission) directs this criss-cross who-dunnit-to-whom shoot-'em-up thriller.
Prediction: As a rule, I avoids movies with Don Johnson since his "acting" makes my teeth hurt. But I may have to make an exception since this was directed by Joffé, even though his last couple of flicks, like The Scarlet Letter, left a lot to be desired. Or, I may just stay home and pop The Mission into the VCR...
Probable Entertainment Value: C

Ray (Eddie Murphy) and Claude (Martin Lawrence) are wrongly convicted of a murder and sent to the Mississippi state pen, where they spend the next 60 years learning about humor conquering all hardship, even silly career moves.
Prediction: I'm sure it'll be just as good as the last three Eddie Murphy vehicles—for what that's worth.
Probable Entertainment Value: C

It is the summer of '69. The world is violently changing, seemingly overnight. Except for Pearl (Diane Lane), a beautiful housewife who got married and pregnant a little bit too early to enjoy the revolution. Then she goes on vacation to the Catskills and her inner vixen gets the chance to awaken; as does her teenage daughter's. Oy, how will it all end?
Prediction: Toss-up. Could be good. Could be so full of schmaltz it'll choke ya.
Probable Entertainment Value: B

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