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Metro Pulse Psychic Movie Predictions

JANUARY 25, 1999: 

Think fast: what would you do if you stumbled across a cool four mil, could take it without anyone's knowledge, and would then have to spend the next few years lying to each and every person in your small town? Oh, and would probably have to do the whole kill or be killed thing to hang onto it. Would it be worth it? Bill Paxton, Billy Bob Thornton, and Bridget Fonda find the answer in this Sam Raimi directed project.
Prediction: The acting will be brilliant, I'm sure. The script should be pretty solid. But, to be honest, Raimi is one of those directors whose stark, dark style you either love or hate. If you dug Evil Dead or any of its ilk, A Simple Plan should make your head spin. If you'd chew off your arm to escape a Raimi creation, go see Gloria, which will be exactly like everything you've seen before.
Probable Entertainment Value: B

Lemme get this straight—Gena Rowlands got an Oscar nod for her work in the 1980 Gloria (of which this is a "'90s" retelling, whatever the hell that means) and now they've replaced her with a glammed-up, Sharon Stone version of herself for this slick, Sidney Lumet piece o'schlock? Oh, the humanity.
Prediction: Why, oh why, do they keep remaking pictures from the '70s? Is no one in Hollywood writing anything original—other than BASEketball, that is.
Probable Entertainment Value: D

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