For a relatively low-budget horror movie with
no ideas of its own, Phantoms is mildly entertaining for
a while. Director Joe Chappelle fills as much of the film as he
can with basic scenes wherein characters hear strange sounds and
go looking to see what caused them. When this spookiness wears
thin, he brings in Peter O'Toole as a wizened archaeologist-turned-tabloid
writer. But much more than charisma is needed, so the film gruesomely
kills off deputy Liev Schreiber just to bring him back as an evil,
mutilated being who sings "I Fall To Pieces" at every
opportunity. When that gets old, the Dean Koontz story veers from
Satanic to scientific and a bogus last-minute plot emerges, leading
to several cheesy special-effects scenes reminiscent of The
Thing and The Blob mixed together in a blender with
some sludge. The boring Ben Affleck, Joanna Going and Rose McGowan
(Scream's doggie-door girl) also star. Unfortunately, they
survive.
--Woodruff
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